The rule is not about minutes but about company: if it is on, someone is watching it with them, talking about it, pausing it. This is the position with the best empirical support in the whole instrument — joint media engagement is where the language-learning findings come from — and also the most expensive in adult time, which is why few households run it past the toddler years.
What it asks of you
- Your actual presence, which is the entire method and cannot be delegated to the screen
- Giving up the thing screens are most often used for — a gap in which to do something else
- Watching a great deal of children's television
Everyone sits down, the rules get written, and they apply to the whole house. The content of the plan matters less than the two features that define it: it is explicit, so nobody is improvising at bedtime, and it binds the adults, so it is a rule about the household rather than a rule about being a child. It is the approach most likely to survive a second parent disagreeing, because the disagreement gets had once and written down.
What it asks of you
- Actually sitting down and writing it, which most households never get to
- Living under your own rule, including the part about phones at dinner
- Revisiting it, because a plan written for a five-year-old is wrong for an eight-year-old